Happy 50th Anniversarry, Mom & Dad!

As I woke up this morning my thoughts were with my parents, as today is their 50th wedding anniversary. As I reflect over the 47 years that I have known my parents, I realize that many of the things I do today can be traced back to the way I was raised. So, on this occasion, here are some rambling reflections on growing up in the Kwiatkowski home.

My parents taught me the importance of family time. With a family of seven, we didn’t have money to take fancy vacations, but we did a lot together as a family. We went camping together, we had frequent Sunday afternoon picnics, we twice drove across the country to Arizona and back (1968 and 1973) and we did many other things as a family. I have often thought that my own travels across the USA have been a result of my parents showing me the country, and it will be a special feeling today to show my boys the Grand Canyon, as my parents introduced me to this marvel back in 1973.

My parents taught me the importance of families serving others together. From 1969 to 1976, mom and dad would drive to Yonkers, NY at least once a month to try to meet the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of men living at a mission for alcoholics. The mission had an evening religious service, and dad would preach there and our family would play some hymns on a variety of musical instruments. Then we would go downstairs and mingle with the men for a long time afterward. (I learned to play ping-pong with these men, among other things!) The compassion that my parents had for these men has left a lasting impression on me, and has given me the desire to impart this to my children.

My parents encouraged a spirit of adventure. We were free at a young age to roam the woods, to go camping with friends, to experiment, and to try new things. We were each allowed to pursue our own interests, and we were encouraged in these things.

My parents were always there for us. When George and I joined the cub scouts and boy scouts, dad became a leader there. When I started playing soccer, mom and dad were regularly in attendance. When George joined a rock band, dad would go along to his gigs to help carry and load equipment. When I started running track, dad came to meets and then became an official so he could help at meets. When we went to college, we were supported financially and also with encouragement and interest from my parents.

My parents encouraged the productive use of time. I have long felt that a significant aspect of my childhood was the fact that we did not have a TV in the house. My parents didn’t ban us from TV – we watched when at our grandparents and at friend’s homes – they just didn’t want one in our home. So what do you do with your time as a child in the absence of TV? You pursue hobbies and interests. You read books, take walks in the woods, build tree forts, build go-carts, ride and work on bicycles, plant a garden, play outside with neighbors, etc. I never missed TV, and I actually feel sorry for children who have spent thousands of hours in front of the TV or computer because of what they have not been able to do and learn with all of this time.

My parents showed me the importance of spiritual things. Both mom and dad had life-changing spiritual experiences while in college, and when they met and married they were determined to pass this along to their children. So it was church three times a week, Bible reading and prayer at the dinner table each night, and many other events meant to build a spiritual awareness. When I got to college I rebelled against all this and sought my own way for five years. It didn’t work, and at age 23 I turned back to God to fill the void in my life. Since then, my relationship with God has been the driving factor in all I have chosen to do. I know it was hard on my parents when I turned away from God in my late teens, but the influences that they put on me at an early age were always there, and remain today.

And so, mom and dad, I’m glad for the vow you made 50 years ago today, and for all the love and support you have shown me over these last 47 years! I have never felt that I was outside of your love, and you will never be outside of mine. Happy Anniversary!!